The Olympos Bender

Here is a story told in pictures of a night out I had in Antalya, which finished 24 hours later in a place called Olympos, 70km away. I could say more but I think the photos demonstrate the insanity better than my words ever could.

‘Another Friday night in Adı Bar. Wonder where this one will end up?
Ok Özgür, keep them coming.’

“I just can’t resist a beautiful woman. Emily’s not bad either.”

‘Give us a cuddle sweetheart’
‘Beş lira az para cuddle sen’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour, nob stewart

‘Çok Güzel Kadinlar, soyle Peynir’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour, nob stewart

‘I don’t know why but I feel 10 feet tall’
‘Çunku ben çok kisa kadin, sen çok aptal adam.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Billy, don’t you know I’m getting divorced? I don’t want photos of me on the internet…. especially if it looks like ah’m having fun, so you can stick that camera where the sun don’t shine’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Take one of me then Billy. Let the world see how beautiful I am’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Make sure you tell your affluent friends I’m single and looking for love, eh?’
‘Hey Ceyda, what a coincidence, so am I.’
‘Yeah, but you’ve no chance.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘What do you think of my moves Billy?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘I’ve been watching you on the pole’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Oh yeah, this one’s for the ladies. Put your tongue away Michael’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘But you have such a cute ass’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Hey Billy, do you know how bad we can be?’
‘Yeah, show him Serap’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘See, we can rock the Pole too’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Don’t worry Serap, I love bad girls.’
‘Do you really? Prove it then, what bad thing would you would like to do with me?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Is this a clear enough indication?’
‘I think I got the message. Oh, by the way, you have no chance.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Let me try this pole thingy’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘He he he. See how naughty I am?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘But nobody here is as bad ass as me’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Well, apart from him obviously’
‘That’s right Baldy.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Do you wanna be in our gang? It’ll cost you. Your money or your life?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Oi Billy. What did I tell you about that bloody camera?’
‘You can dance but you can’t hide. He he. Come on Michael and Callie follow me into the toilets for some fun. Serap, you guard the door.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

B: ‘Ok Callie, that’s enough. You can let go now. ‘
C: ‘Why? He asked for it. ‘
M: ‘Aaarrraaarrraaagghh!! I thought she was joking when she said could make a man cum from his boots inside 30 seconds ‘
S: Whats going on in there? ‘
B,C & M: ‘NOTHING!! ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

C: ‘He’s not wearing that T-Shirt for a bet is he? ‘
S: ”fraid so ‘
M: ‘Who wants Tequila? ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Don’t you think it suits me Billy? ‘
‘Well Michael, it’s certainly not the worst ah’ve seen…….

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

…..case in point.
But haven’t the Bros twins have aged? ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Shit, that Tequila has just kicked in. How are you doing Michael? ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Wheeeeee ‘
‘As good as that eh? Well, don’t worry at least you are doing better than Memet ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Insan Siktiir Git! Evde gidiyorsiz. Ben gideyorum ambulans ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Went to Michaels after Adı Bar, had a few cocktails but you know how Canadians need their bed at before 4am… pussies. So me and Callie kept partying and have now come to the beach at 7am for a last drink before hitting the sack ourselves hopefully. ‘ 😉

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Poor boy, he has no idea what I have planned for him’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Yeah Billy, smile it up. It may be morning but the night is young. Ha ha ha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Only another 14 hours until bedtime. I will run you into the ground before I am finished with you, ha ha ha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

The calm before the storm.

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Ok Callie, peace out. Don’t worry I have a drinks cabinet at home. ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

‘Callie, why are you organizing transport? ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, poet, poetry, scottish, humour

11:30 am – After drinking for 13 hours conversation tends to get deep. It’s the only thing that convinces the brain that sleep cannot solve the worlds problems.

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Callie, what have I told you about leaving your inflatable sex toys in my kitchen? I have a young son you know? ‘
“Hahahahh hahahhaha ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

’12:30 – Time for bed methinks. 🙂 ‘
‘Little does he know. Haahhaahha Haahhhahhhaa. ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘;Right Billy, pack yer bag, we’re off to Olympos ‘
‘Yeah, right. Do you think I’m off my head? ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Looks like I’m off my head. ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Either that or I’m having a brain hemorrhage. ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘What’s that Callie? Wine? Second Wind? You have got to be fucking joking…………….

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

……apparently not. Fuck. You better make mine a large one. ‘
‘You wish. Hahahahaha hahahahaha. ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Callie, do you have a thing for dragging men to beaches or is it just me in particular? ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

Just my luck. The father interrupts the view. 🙁

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Christ Callie, where you been? Were you peeing for Antalya? ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Look Billy, invisible frogs ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘What do you mean I am hearing things?
Watch, I’ll hook one to prove it to you. ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Relax, I’m an experienced hunter. One of these boys will bite soon. ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘I am telling you there are frogs in there and I will kiss them all until I find a Prince Charming. Did I tell you that I’m lonely? ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Ah sod it, come on Billy, I’m getting thirsty, time for that second bottle of wine. This one’s special. 🙂 ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Callie, what happened to you? ‘
‘Ah’ve entered the Twilight Zone. Ma name is noo Senga. ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Are ye man enough fur the Twilight Zone, Billy? Ha ha ha ‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Come and join uz on the dark side ya radge. Where angels fear tae tread and ah’m no’ talking aboot Glasgow’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘There is fuck all any’hin tae be afraid of, trust uz. Hahha hahaha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Once I get him into my evil lair he will do whatever I say. Hahahahahaha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Right now, it’s your turn. Fuckin DRINK ya pussy’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Alright Senga, keep your knickers on. I get the message.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Shit Senga, whit have ye done? Whit the hell was in that wine bottle? It certainly wisnae Cabernet Sauvignon’
‘Hahaha, it was my secret formula. Extra strong Buckfast and Whisky cocktail with a dash ae Haggis flavouring. Dinnae worry the effects will wear aff in aboot 6 hoors. Hahahahahah.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Whit’s that funny noise a’ hear? Kinda like Trumpets playin?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Hey man, this shit is mental.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Hahahahahaha. I’ve cast an evil spell on ye. Ha ha. You’re a Nob and ye must do as I say if I command it tae be so. Hahahahahaha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘But the potion wiz only supposed tae work on you. A’ dinnae ken why a’ feel so zombiefied. Hahahah haahhahha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Hahahaha, the joke is on ye Senga, cause a’ added some Rhypnol tae yer plastic cup while ye were laughing at me. Hahahahha. Noo whae’s laughing?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Hahhahah, hilarious. Hahahaha. You got me Nob. Hahahahahaha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Aye, and noo ah’ve had ye.

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

“Was a’ any good?”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SpQuE1YAUjw

‘Let’s jist say ah’ve had better but ah’ll not hold that against ye.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

Gie us a kiss and we’ll call it a’ square

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘You may have won the battle Nob but I will win the war.
I command you to take off all your clothes and go for a swim right NOW.’
‘Don’t be stupid Senga, there are people everywhere……..

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

….fur some reason I feel like going fur a swim.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

Come on Nob, you can do it

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Wi’ ma muscles likes knots in a midges penis.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘What dae ye ‘hink ae ma underwear Senga?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Sexy, eh?’
‘Aye, but ye arenae any Calvin Cline model. Hahahhaha Hahahahhaa.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Right, noo that a’ hiv done ma mental preperation and yoga exercises …a’ am guid tae go’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Are you ready Senga?’
‘Get yer arse in their noo, Nob. I command ye. Haahhahha’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Yee-Ha’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Let’s Do This!’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Geronimo’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘In fur a penny….

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘In fur a pound’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Jesus, it’s cauld’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Mamma Mia’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Help!’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Help!’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘AAArrrrggghhhh’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Why am I doing this again?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Oh aye, Sengas Evil Spell’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Still, a nice day for it.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Apart fae those fucking waves’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘I want ma mammy’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘A’ cannae feel ma legs.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Ah, getting used tae it noo.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘It’s nae sae bad aftir a’, Peace.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

Whae’s the Faither?

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Phprrrghhuuulgh.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Hey Nob, a’ command ye tae stick yer head under fur uz. Haaahahhhaah.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Right Nob, a’ hiv had ma fun, ye kin come oot noo. Hahhahhah.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘These fucking waves.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Right, ye kin stop taking photos noo Senga.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Seriously, pit that fucking thing awa’.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Ah’m gonnae bust yer balls Senga.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Stop laughing!!!’
‘Hahhahhahahh hahahhahhah hahahhahhaha hahahhahaha hahahahahaha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Ye ‘hink ah’m fucking jokin?’
‘Hahhahhahahh hahahhahhah hahahhahhaha hahahhahaha hahahahahaha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Whit dae ye mean ye want me tae pose fur ye? Whit the hell ye on aboot?’
‘Stand over there, a’ want a full frontal. Hahahah hahahah hhahahhahah.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘That’s fighting talk. Ye’ will probably pit it on facebook. Ye ‘hink ah’m daft?’
‘A’ command ye tae stand over there and pit yer thumbs up.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Happy noo?’
‘Hhahhahaaha Hhahhahaaha Hhahhahaaha Hhahhahaaha Hhahhahaaha’
‘The water is fucking freezin, a’right?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Look, here’s whit a’ ‘hink ae yoo richt noo.’
‘Hhahhahaaha Hhahhahaaha Hhahhahaaha Hhahhahaaha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Nob, that wiz so funny. Thanks darling. In return a’ will dae su’hin fur ye.’
‘Oh aye, it wiz real funny. A’ll probably never live they photos doon. Whit ye gonnae dae fur uz?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Well, let’s jist say it involves naked flesh’
‘Yer toes arenae that sexy Senga. Christ they arenae even painted right.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘No, but ma tits are sexy baby, aren’t they?’
‘Holy Shit Senga. You mean a’ never needed tae date rape ye?’
‘Aye ye did. A’ jist like takin some sexy photos of me at the beach, ye ken, fur facebook. Ye never ken who might be lookin. So snap awa’ wee boy. Hahahah.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Make sure ye get a guid yin ae ma arse.’
‘Jesus,that arse is a peach. Cheers Senga. Yer nae sae bad aftir a’. A’ is forgiven. Whit say we dae a tour ae the ancient ruins, ye up fur that?’
‘A’ dinnae ken if a wild bear shits in the woods but a’ certainly dae. Haahhaahha hhahahhaa’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Ah cannae make oot a single wurd Nob. Whit’s that big yin at the top?’
‘A’ believe that says Oily Pus.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Dinnae worry Nob, a’ will be yer tour guide. A’ ken a’ aboot ancient shit. A’ watched a documentary on it once.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Fur instance, this is an ancient large freezer. Where they used tae store chickens before they figured a way oot.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Cool, but where did they used tae go fur a crap. Any ancient bogs aroond here’
‘Dinnae worry Nob, a’ ken jist the place, follow me.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Here’s the yin a’ used earlier.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Christ Senga, ye could hae pit the paper doon the hole.’
‘Dinnae be daft Nob, these days we hiv biodegradable wet wipes.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Whit are ye lookin fur noo Senga? There arnae any ancient hunks aroond ye ken? And naebody is gonna use ma genitals to model a statue aftir.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Ah’m lookin fur another place tae empty ma bladder. I luv marking ma territory.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Cause ah’m just a big pussy cat at heart. Hhhaahhahahha hhahahahaha. Get it? God a’ ah’m jist so fucking funny today’
‘Aye sure Senga, jist get yer skates on cause a’ cannae see a place that sells beer aroond here.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘There’s boond tae be a guid spot around here somewhere’
‘Wait fur me fur fucks sake. A’ wanna get this on camera.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Shit, too late. Didnae even catch a guid glimpse fur future wanking material’
‘Ha ha, ye missed me Nob. That photo would hiv went viral. Looks like you will be stuck in obscurity forever. Hahahah hahahah hahahaha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Hold on a minute Nob. A’ feel su’hin between ma legs’
‘MMmmm maybe ah’m just in time after a’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Hahhahah dinnae make me laugh ya eejit, ah’ve seen whit ye hiv tae offer. Hahahahahahah Hahahah. A’ jist had some leaves doon ma crotch.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Me masturbating fur ye on camera? Hahahahaha hhahahhhah hahhahaha. Don’t make me laugh. A’ would rather webcam fur the whole Isle of Skye and ye ken who much a cannae stand the inhabitants of that place. Hahahaha hahahha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

Nob, that is hilarious. A’ may hiv been drinking for 20 hoors but a’ll never be that drunk. Hahahhahha hahahhahhah

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Bitch’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Right, come on. Let’s dae the culture thing. Take a photae wi’ me an’ and some rocks.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Did ye capture ma guid side? These are fur ma Maw so she doesnae ‘hink a’ spend a’ ma time in the pub.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Imagine a’ the bawbags, livin’ fur the day. Yoo-hoo hoo oo oo.
Come on Senga, sing along.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘But a’ wanna be a tour guide. Look, this must have been somebodys hoose.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Ah ken ma shit, ye ken?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Walk this way, a wanna show ye su’hin.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Look whit a’ kin dae. HHhahhahhahha Hahahhahahahah.’
‘Aye Senga, impressive. You’ll be in the Olympic Gymnastic team next.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Right Nob, a’ command ye tae get inside this hole right now.’
‘Aye? Inside what hole?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘”Damn. Wrong again. This wiznae the hole a’ hid in mind. A’ live in hope though, that one day a’ kin hae sex withoot havin tae drug a bird”‘

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘A’right Senga, Peace. Nae mare commands a’right?
Christ knows whit ye’ll hae me dain next!’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Aye, very funny Senga, very funny.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘A’ shouldnae hae pit ma heed upside doon like that Senga. A’ dinnae feel so guid’
‘A’ sort yersel oot ya wimp and go stand over there, a command it. Hahhahaha.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Hurry up, ma legs are like jelly.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Ye ‘hink mine are any better?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘No, but at least ye dinnae hae treble vision.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Aye, is that right? Says who? Ah’ve had quadruple vision since you fed me that Rohypnol’
‘Oh aye, sorry aboot that. Jist a bit ae fun, eh?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Aye, it wiz a guid laugh. Jist as well a’ cannae remember it.
Hhhahha ahhhahahahah.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

Come on Nob, give us a hand

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Screw you bitch. You made me get ma cock out on the beach in front of children. A’ could be getting rogered in a Turkish jail right noo’
‘Don’t worry, the children couldn’t see anything, jist like the rest ae uz. Hhahhhahhahh Hahhahahah.’
‘A’ told ye that water wiz fucking cold, a’right?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Ah, come on Nob, ye love me really, don’t ye?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Aye, at least ye are game fur a laugh a’ suppose. Ah’ll say that fur ye.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Come on then Senga, yin last photo before the cocktail wears aff.’
‘Aye, and your remote chances ae getting yer hands on ma boobies again disappear furever.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Billy, can you remember anything about the last 6 hours? I remember opening the wine and then …..it’s a total blank.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘No, I can’t remember anything Callie. I don’t even know how we got here. You say this place is called Olympos, right? Oh well, Cheers.’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Come on Callie, hold your head up. You can’t be tired of taking photos, can you? I mean, that’s impossible isn’t it?’

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Enough Billy, put it away for another day.’
‘Come on, just one more..

billy watson, billywatsontv, comedy, comedian, scottish, humour, poem, poet

‘Fuck you Billy……. and the horse you rode in on’
‘Huh, well there’s gratitude for you. Goodnight Callie.’
‘Goodnight Sucker Hahhahahhaa hhaahahahha hahahhaha.’

Well, I know it was quite long but I hope you enjoyed our wee adventure. Safe to say though, that that will be the last time I ever stay up drinking all night and through the next day. My brain felt like it was going to implode for a few days afterwards.

The Photos

Cheers!

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