I like to go out for a drink
With my friends Tugce and Ebru
We call ourselves ‘The Olympos Team’
Or sometimes the ‘Funtalya Beer Crew’
They sometimes invite some friends
Who cannot understand what I say
Their English is like my Turkish
Fortunately, alcohol smooths the way
It is weird living in another culture
I feel so sorry for young women here
Their families are very controlling
It’s a miracle the girls even drink beer
But they manage in spectacular fashion
These girls sure know how to party
The beautiful thing is they can get drunk
Without resorting to the need to be clarty
Some men would be disappointed
That all that beer is going to waste
But I don’t need to have sex with them
If I did their drink would be laced
But they had to go home early that evening
So I went to Dip Bar to see ‘Blues Box’
My african friend Hendi, is their singer
They certainly are the dogs bollocks
They know how to whip up the crowd
By playing popular hits of the past
Dancing with beautiful young women
You can be sure that I had a blast
Nicko and Sebnem who work with Hendi
Turned up to show their support
Sebnem really seemed to love them
Cause all she did was snort
I know my patter is not that funny
Nicko’s fly was not undone
So it must have been their music
That was causing her so much fun
At one point I thought I had got lucky
With a bird with long flowing blonde hair
If only she knew how to shave
Cause her face looked like that of a bear
Unfortunately, she soon disappeared
So I made some advances on the bar lady
She humoured me for about five minutes
Before telling me my moves were shady
So my friends and I continued to drink
Nicko must have had a couple of E’s
Cause long after the band had left
He was still raving to sounds of the nineties
But the sad news is that Hendi will leave soon
A new adventure awaits him in Brazil
Let’s hope the band survives without him
I’m sure they will because they are brill
If they are ever really desperate for a singer
I would happily volunteer
The only problem is that I can’t sing
Unless I have twelve bottles of beer
Then I can’t remember the words
Or even stand up on my feet
But inside my head I’m a rock star
As I get thrown out onto the street
If only I had a voice like the man himself
Maybe that’s why women throw themselves at him
Maybe I need to try a new sober strategy
Or get myself down to the gym
What’s he got that I haven’t?
Apart from a voice, good looks and charm?
Surely skin colour is not that important
Maybe he’s got a cock like a baby’s arm
So good luck Hendi in your new life
Or rather, a new chapter of the old one
If you thought Turkish girls were crazy
Apparently, Brazilians are even more fun
The Photos
Cheers!
Donate
