In Glumbada

I’ve been here for six long years
Please don’t ask how many beers
Cause I’m not allowed to smoke dope in Glumbada
If I had a smoke I’d be well chilled out

I wouldn’t need to scream or shout
In fact I’d be quite mellow in Glumbada

Fortunately, I’ve got a secret supplier
Although I’ve smoked dirt that has got me higher
Beggars can’t be choosers in Glumbada
You’ve got to take what you can get

Although every deal is like losing a bet
It’s how I get through life in Glumbada

I wish that I could find a job
One that pays and doesn’t rob
But that’s like finding a needle in a haystack
All I want is to get some money

By maybe being a little bit funny
But you can’t get blood from a stone in Glumbada

Cause the bosses here expect you to work
Then they act like a total jerk
And I don’t suck the cock of fucking wankers
Are you the same? Or do you play their game?

Do you live in the hall of shame?
There’s got to be more to life in Glumbada

I would like to cut back on dope
But to do that I would have to have hope
And that has been annihilated through experience
I had some jobs that didn’t pan out

Arsekish bosses don’t like it when you shout
So they can all suck my cock in Glumbada

So where do I go from here
I’ve got no money left to buy beer
And drugs have already cost me my marriage
I’m hoping I can find a bird to screw

Who’s really rich and horny too
So that I can find some solace in Glumbada

I can now relate to Arsekish men
Who make advances to escape the den
Of preying vipers who suck their very soul dry
I’m sure that you would do it too

If you’re freedom ticket was a damn good screw
For age is not a barrier in Glumbada

I do feel sorry for the women here
Whose fathers don’t let them drink beer
Cause they know all the men are exactly like they are
If it breathes, they will shag it

They’re as horny as a wild giant rabbit
Religion is a façade in Glumbada

At least the single guys don’t lie
They would like to stab your brown eye
Providing you’ve got a pussy cause they’re homophobic
Me think they doth protest too much

Don’t tell them I said that or I’ll need a crutch
Be careful what you say in Glumbada

So what are we going to do?
Are we going to keep living in a zoo?
Or are we going to change our ways of relating?
Maybe I could love you

Without the need to down a few
But I would still like to get high in Glumbada

For why is it against the law
Just to smoke some tasty draw
What are the politicians so afraid of?
Maybe we would all chill out

And realise we don’t have to shout
Start being civil to each other in Glumbada

So that is my thoughts on that
I bet now you think I’m a total pratt
Well, if I am then so was Musthava Donkey
For he was a radical too

And I’m sure he liked to screw
I’ve seen his double bed in Glumbada

So the time has come to bid you farewell
You and I can now see the smell
What are you going to do with what I’ve told you?
I’ll bet you go back to your shitty job

After all it’s only your life they rob
But hey, it’s nearly always sunny in Glumbada

I’ll be here if you need a friend
It’s the only way we can start to mend
The chaos and the turmoil in Glumbada
Other places may be worse to live

But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t give
Our love and our friendship in Glumbada

Maybe we could set the bar
Cause without love we won’t get far
So let’s join together to form a real community
Then we’ll see an explosion of truth

Because we won’t be so aloof
We’ll all live happily ever after in Glumbada

I mean wouldn’t that be great
If you don’t have to start work at eight
We’d be free to create the life we so desire
You’d be free to laugh and dance and sing

You could even make love without a ring
The sunshine would come from within in Glumbada

So this is what we must do
If we want to create something new
We must stand up for the truth here in Glumbada
Don’t look away when the children cry

You must sit them down and dry their eye
Let your life be an example in Glumbada

Cause the day will come not far from now
When the children don’t want to eat cow
And you don’t want to get left behind, now do ya?
So stand up tall and make the break

Do it if only for heaven’s sake
And the future will be alive in Glumbada

Cheers!